You suck!!

So today, I had one of those ah-ha moments that Oprah talks about- but not in a good way. Matthew (our 2 1/2 year old) and I had a great day shopping and going out to lunch. He was such a good little shopper and had no potty accidents, which I was very proud of him for. So when we got home he wanted a snack and I proceeded to fix him a little cup of goldfish. When he was climbing onto the chair at the kitchen table he accidentally knocked the whole cup onto the floor. He immediately looked down at the scattered goldfish and said, "You suck!!" I immediately told him it was ok and I would get him some more. Then I realized WHY he had said that. Only because he has heard me say it when I or one of the other kids spilled something. Wow, that makes a mom feel good...

Lesson of the day (thanks to Matthew):
Don't cry over spilled milk, or goldfish for that matter!

Things you take for granted...

...Like the ability to walk, move, bend over, etc... So, I strained my low back by doing kickboxing. I guess I got a little too wild with those back kicks. Then I did 3 hours of massaging today. Not a goood combination. So I am now in the recliner, icing my back and watching "Fly Me to the Moon" with the kids. Days like today remind me how blessed I am to be married to a chiropractor. :0) I'm not looking forward to the rest of the week: babysitting my nephew and 3 more massages. I hope I can take it easy enough tomorrow to be functional on Friday. It is hard for us mom's to take it easy when there is homework to do, baths to take, and lunches to make. So I just do what I can do. I will try to remember this the next time I'm not in pain, so I'll be a little more grateful for my fully functioning body.

A Quiet Saturday Night

Ok, so my loving hubby took the kids out to look at Christmas lights tonight. I wasn't feeling all that great earlier, so I stayed home with my dear son (the 2 yr. old). I can't remember the last time the house was so quiet. I long for these times to just sit and do nothing and yet it's quiet, too quiet. I know my husband is a very capable father but when they called me to tell me they had a great time and were on their way home, I was a little relieved that everything went ok. I do feel like I somewhat missed out on the festivities tonight but I know they need these adventures with their dad too. I'm often so caught up in the details that I have a hard time enjoying our little outings together. That's something their dad has absolutely to problem with and something I really need to work on.

My Life The Sitcom

Do you ever feel like you are living in a sitcom? I mean, my life literally could be a sitcom. If it was on TV I'd watch it, laugh at it, and probably pity the poor mom in it. But really I would just appreciate that we really all the same going through this journey of Motherhood. I look into the faces of these little monsters (kids) I've created and often ask myself, "Why did I want kids," and in the next moment, "I wish we could have 10 more!" I feel like a schizophrenic. I mean I am incredibly blessed and I do thank God everyday for all that He has given me, and yet some moments, if feel like I've lost myself, or really I never knew myself to begin with. I was married young, at 19, and had my first child at 21. The only dream I've ever had since I was a little girl was to get married and have children. When my first child was born, a beautiful little angel, Emma, I thought things would be wonderful. I had never felt that much love before! But to make a long story short, the images and expectations I had in my mind of what motherhood would be like, quickly faded as the cold reality slapped me in the face. It was hard to admit that I wasn't really as prepared as I thought I was. But things did get better and as Emma and I got to know each other more, we were able to work out our differences. (There aren't many-that's the problem) :) Since Emma we've had 3 more: Joshua, Lily, and Matthew. Each, so different and wonderful in their own way. The biggest thing that I didn't expect was how much having kids would change me and teach me. God is using them everyday to refine me. It is painful at times but rewarding all the same. So this blog is hopefully for me and for them, to cronicle our adventures through this beautiful mess we call motherhood.